| Various circumstances as well as her love of everything French led Alice to move from the USA to France. Living in the Parisian suburb of Houilles, she works as a bilingual assistant -- with plans to fulfill artistic aspirations in the near future. Here, Alice shares the circumstances of her relocation to France, her thoughts on speaking French, and tips on living in France. |
 Alice |
-Where were you born?
Baltimore, Maryland, USA
-In which country and city are you living now?
Houilles, France – a small suburb of Paris, in Ile-de-France
-Are you living alone or with your family?
I live with my boyfriend, who is half-French, half-German.
-How long have you been living in France?
In France, about 5 years total. In this particular town, nearly 2 years.
-What is your age?
I’m 32.
-When did you come up with the idea of living in France?
It’s a very long story in my case! But to sum up, basically I fell in love with France when I was in college, and changed my major from fine arts to French, and from then on I became addicted to the French language and culture – a bit of an unoriginal story, I guess… But on my return to the U.S. in 1997, after having taught English in France, for a year, I decided that I didn’t want to lose my French, and that one day I hoped to move back to France and make my life here. So I spent some time at the Alliance Française to maintain my language skills.
Life and circumstances brought me back to France in 2002, with my husband at the time. We had lived together for several years in Washington, DC, and decided to start over again in France. Things didn’t end up working out between us in the end, and as a result we divorced. So I started over again, but decided to try to stick it out in France, even if it meant being on my own… Since then I have someone new in my life, and I’m trying to find my place here as an expat and as a woman starting over – which basically explains the title of my blog, “The Late Bloomer”. I feel like I’m beginning anew, and am blooming a bit later in life, so to speak. And I hope to continue to evolve in a positive direction in the years to come. I still haven’t lost my love of the French language, and of the country, even if life here isn’t always easy. No country is perfect, but this country feels like home to me now.
-Was it hard to get a visa or a working permit?
Well, I know this is a difficulty for all expats, and it has become even more challenging in recent years. But in my case, things were different because I was married to a Frenchman at the time and this did help me in the bureaucratic process. I am grateful for that, but I know it is also possible to get a visa and/or work permit with persistence and determination if you are an expat arriving in the country on your own. You just have to stick with it and go after all the possibilities – there are several blogs out there of women who have done this (samdebretagne, theboldsoul, maîtresse come to mind – I have many other expat links on my blog) where they chronicle their experiences, the challenges, the difficulties, etc. I don’t tend to go into things like that on my blog, although from time to time I may have a bureaucratic "rant" or I may recount a particularly difficult experience I had of my own here in France.
-Was it difficult for you to get medical insurance before you went there or when you first arrived?
Again, my experience is unique! I do benefit from Sécurité Sociale here, and once you actually are employed in France you can benefit from health insurance. But it is difficult, because you need a work permit (or a student status) to get a job, and yet you need a job lined up to get the work permit, so – like I said, vicious circle. But I had health insurance as I was married to a Frenchman, and now that I’m divorced I still work and therefore was able to maintain my health insurance.
-How do you make your living in France? Do you have any type of income generated?
I think, again, it is possible to find a job, or more importantly an employer who will hire you to do things like teach English, etc., without necessarily having a work permit from the get-go, but finding work here definitely isn’t easy, especially anywhere outside of Paris and the surrounding region. I am currently a bilingual assistant within an OECD-based delegation, but job prospects can be few and far-between at times. I started out working in a French-American bookshop, and I enjoyed certain aspects of that job, but it was tough to make a living on that salary. So I moved on to an office-based job, and I try to do some English teaching/tutoring on the side as well. Teaching English is of course always an option, but it isn’t easy either – and it isn’t for all of us! I find that I enjoy working with children and adults, but it can be challenging to find the right balance. And it’s tough to work out your schedule on a daily basis when you only teach. I think you really need to be "cut out" to do that kind of thing on a full-time basis.
As far as tools, I do tend to recommend the magazine FUSAC (France-USA Contacts), which also has a website (http://www.fusac.fr) which although sometimes inconsistent is still a very useful resource for networking, housing, and employment prospects. Even if you may not always find something in there, I come back to it again and again.
-Do you speak French and do you think it's important to speak the local language?
Personally, I think it is important to at least make an effort to learn the language, even if you arrive not speaking it very well… I learned French originally in high school, then in college, and then continued and learned to speak the language here in the country. But of course many people do arrive without the language foundation, and I think you can take courses here and learn – many people have done this, and quite well, over the years. But if you want to work, I think it’s essential to learn the language… Otherwise you do tend to feel a bit "left out" or excluded from many experiences. Plus, as a form of respect for the locals, I think it’s important to learn at least the basics in order to be understood and to communicate.
I’ve enjoyed learning more and more about the language, the culture and the customs in France over the years, and even when it’s maddening, when there are things that I don’t necessarily understand, I try to keep an open mind and to breach that cultural divide. I think an open mind is the key thing as an expat – to not be constantly complaining about the differences in the country, the things that are so different from "back home." I mean, again, we all have our rants and our complaints, and it is tough being far from our home country, but the key to finding a certain balance and happiness abroad, I believe, is learning to accept and respect the local customs and to even enjoy them. I’ve become so used to the cultural traditions here – the baguette at the boulangerie, the exchanges with people in shops, the café after lunch – that I actually miss them when I go home to visit family in the States. Of course, some of this may sound a bit clichéd, and it’s certainly nothing new – but I honest-to-goodness firmly believe in learning to adapt to a culture and trying to perhaps not necessarily blend in, per se, but at least to find the right "fit," a comfort zone that is a good balance of your own identity and of the country that you have adopted as your (new) home.
-Do you miss home and family sometimes?
Oh, I absolutely miss my family – my parents, my brothers, my niece and my closest friends back in the U.S. – and I think there are certain points throughout the year when this homesickness is the strongest or the most vivid – like at the holidays, the end of the year, and in the middle of the summer… when I’m used to having Chesapeake Bay crabs, which I talked about on my blog just recently, and sitting around a picnic table, simple things like that. And Christmas is definitely very different here, and although I have adapted to the holiday traditions (I do enjoy the extended family meals, and I love foie gras !) I miss singing carols, going to church on Christmas Eve, and music playing in shops, etc… I know for a lot of people all of that is overkill in the U.S. now, but when you’ve been away from it for so long, you begin to miss it!
But throughout the year here, I enjoy the family meals with my boyfriend’s family, the holidays away to other European countries – being able to travel fairly easily and having the time to get away for either a long weekend or a couple weeks in the summertime. The quality of life is definitely nice. Even if you don’t necessarily make what most people would consider a "good living" here (I get by OK, but it isn’t always easy!) I enjoy the nice things about life here and I try to live in the moment – I feel lucky to have the opportunity to be here. And I try to take things one day at a time. I’ve also enjoyed making new friends in the expat blogosphere, and I enjoy going to the movies in the city pretty often, spending time with both French and Anglophone friends. I’m much more into quiet evenings, though, or small dinner parties, rather than big parties with lots of people. My boyfriend and I both prefer smaller gatherings – I guess I’m showing my age in that sense!
-Do you have other plans for the future?
Well, I’m at a bit of a turning point in my life right now, I guess, because I’ve been considering whether I should try to obtain a French diploma in order to pursue the field of translating in order to work in that domain for a larger company. I feel pretty confident about my language skills, but this is a country where degrees and diplomas stand for a lot and speak much louder than experience, apparently. It’s also often about who you know… Connections and that sort of thing. I’m at a bit of a "Carrefour" or crossroads in my life, and I’m trying to make some serious decisions about my future. I’ve spent a lot of my time recently questioning where I stand and what I really want, and it’s tough! I did manage to make a life for myself here, but there are constant challenges, and I guess as humans we are never fully content in the moment – we’re always looking for something more, or some way to better ourselves. And I feel like I haven’t done enough in that area in recent years. So we’ll see what the next few years bring.
I’d also like to find my way back to my interests in the arts, a field I abandoned in college when I followed the "French track," and I’ve been trying to delve back into drawing and interests in that domain. Friends who have common interests in that area have been helping me out with my motivation and my interests, so again, I hope to bring this to some fruition. Just for myself more than anything else. A true sense of fulfillment, I guess.
-What about housing, have you bought, or are you renting a home? How much do you pay for it?
Oh, this is the question of the century! How I wish I could buy an apartment, but alas, for the moment it’s not possible, or simply not within the realm of possibility for me in the immediate future. Housing has gone up a LOT in recent years, especially in the region parisienne, and I think I missed out on the opportunity to make some amazing deals in the late ‘90s… when many people scooped up some incredible apartments at amazing prices. I was too young then – I’ve been giving this some thought with my boyfriend, and granted it would be wiser to invest and buy rather than continuing to rent, but you have to be fully ready to make that kind of huge financial commitment. So again, we’ll see! We moved out to the suburbs of Paris so that we could have a bit more space for a more reasonable price than in the city, but sometimes I do miss the village atmosphere of living within the city "walls" so to speak. But we would probably have to pay almost twice as much (I would guess about 1300€ or more) for the same size of apartment, which is 60 meters squared. Again, that’s just a ballpark figure – I wouldn’t even venture to guess the cost of an apartment that size for purchase – maybe something like 350,000 Euros?
-What is the cost of living in France?
Well, again, living in or around Paris is quite expensive – the cost of living is much higher here than living in the province. But of course, there is more work to be found in Paris… We have considered moving to the South or elsewhere, but it would be a big leap. And would entail a lot of advance planning. Ironically, I find that buying fresh fruit and vegetables at my local market here, though, is not necessarily all that much more expensive than back in Washington, DC, for example. I go to my local market almost every Saturday morning, and I try to get the basics there. I started cooking in France, and I find that I eat much healthier here than I did in the U.S. These are just some things I’ve observed over time, but in particular, I eat far less junk food here and I think my eating habits, on the whole, are much better.
Doing things like going out to eat, going to the movies and such, these are all quite expensive too, but you can find ways to get cheaper deals – particularly if you find the right restaurants in Paris, and often you can collect good addresses over time with friends, exchange ideas and find new places by word of mouth. Plus, like one expat blogger (Le Blagueur à Paris) mentioned recently, there are also a lot of free cultural activities in Paris over the summer – you just have to look for them! Or read the local magazines and newspapers (Télérama, for example).
-What do you think about the French?
Well, of course, Parisians on the whole have a bad reputation with foreigners, but sometimes I think it’s because tourists aren’t very respectful of the people here and the language – just automatically assuming that everyone speaks – and should speak – English. I think if you try to speak just a little bit of French, many people here respect and appreciate the effort and are overall really friendly and helpful. There are some things about the French mentality that will always remain baffling to me (like their need to debate everything! And their constant complaining – "râler" – they say you’ve become native when you’ve learned to complain, rant and rave like the French! ) but then there are other things that I have come to accept and have adapted to.
-What are the positive and negative aspects of living in France?
Again, positives include the good quality of life, the healthier approach to eating and cooking (at least in my experience – but I know there are exceptions to this!), the cultural element – meeting interesting people from all over the world, exchanging common interests, seeing beautiful and incredible historical monuments and landscapes on a regular basis – things I may not have appreciated on my own back home. And I’m sure there’s lots more I’m not thinking of right now!
Negatives might include the cynicism of the French at times, the lack of "convenience" or comfort in certain aspects of life, like screens in the windows (they don’t have them here!) and no air conditioning in the summer – most apartments don’t have AC. I’ve gotten used to this, and I actually don’t mind it too much because I grew up using fans anyway. I mean, sure, it can get uncomfortable, but you get through it. The summer doesn’t last all that long anyway, at least in Paris and the surrounding area (and this year it’s been particularly miserable!) so I look forward to some warmth, even some heat.
Also, you have to expect some rude encounters from time to time, but these can happen anywhere and everywhere. But I think every expat I know would have some negative stories to tell about their bureaucratic and administrative experiences – sometimes it really depends on who you fall on in the offices here, what kind of mood they’re in at the time, etc… Plus, often in France, all the rules that were created seem to be made to be broken – or bent, shall we say, in one way or another. If there’s a rule, you can bet that someone has found a way around it and has managed to reach their goal by being persistent and determined.
Oh, and um, the dog poop. Yes, this issue hasn’t been completely resolved – it has gotten somewhat better, but I stepped in some earlier this week, and it’s the first time it’s happened to me in ages. Unfortunately there are still a lot of people that don’t clean up after their dogs, believe it or not. I’m a bit ashamed to point this out, yet again¸ but it’s so very true. And I don’t know how long it’s going to take the people who do this to move into modern times…
-Do you have any tips for our readers about living in France?
Tips? Well, let’s see… I guess I would say that one shouldn’t expect to be able to come to France today and be able to live and work here without speaking the language. And I personally would think it’s a shame, truly, if it came to the point that English was such the dominant language that people didn’t even attempt to learn French! For me, that’s one of the truly beautiful parts about living here. But again, I have a weakness and an affinity for the language itself. To such an extent, that I have had a hard time learning any other foreign language over the years because I’m so focalized on French! If you would like to live here, it’s probably wise and advisable to have a professional plan, a work plan of some kind, especially if you’re starting from ground zero on your own. If you’re coming over as a couple, and one of the two already has a job, then this may not be necessary.
But I would also say to keep an open mind: please try not to be negative, especially when immediate arriving! I think that negativity can become like a shield and would keep anything from sinking in, from becoming a part of you. I think it’s SO important to try to see the beauty in life here, not to be jaded, but of course to be realistic too. You probably won’t make a lot of money, unless you have an incredible business plan, or are associated with a large company, but you will have the opportunity to discover and visit some incredible places and to see some unforgettable things. Even for me today, I sometimes forget about the amazing things this city, and this country, have to offer because I’ve fallen into my daily routine. And I have to stop and remind myself that things could always be worse!
-Do you have any favorite Web sites or blogs about France?
Wow, again, I have so many expat blogs that I read and enjoy today, it’s extremely difficult for me to limit them to five. I keep a French expat blogroll on my blog, www.alwaysace-thelatebloomer.blogspot.com and I also have to mention the Paris Blog, http://www.theparisblog.com , which always has interesting up-to-date information about activities or more unexpected things about Paris in general, that you won’t find on other more typical city sites.
Chocolate and Zucchini (http://chocolateandzucchini.com) is a wonderful food blog run by a French gal who lived in California for a couple years and just recently published her first cookbook in English. She keeps me informed about food-related activities in the city, in addition to David Lebovitz http://www.davidlebovitz.com.
Two expat blogger friends also do a regular podcast about life in France, and you can find them at http://katiaandkyliemac.blogspot.com. They’re hilarious and so entertaining! And again, I have many other personal faves, so my list could go on forever. You can see them on my blog!
