Liz is no stranger to living in foreign countries, having lived in many places while she was growing up. As a wife, mother, and marketing coordinator in Flyinge, Sweden, she sure leads an active lifestyle. Making friends with Swedes and leading a support group for other American expat women have also helped make the days busier and more enjoyable for Liz.	Elizabeth (Liz) Slaughter-Ek

July 30 2006

-Where were you born?
Detroit, Michigan, but I only lived there for a couple of weeks, as my mom was staying with her parents for my birth while my dad was at Air Force Officer's Training School. I've moved 30 times in my life, thanks to a military brat childhood.

-In which country and city are you living now?
I live in a small village called Flyinge, in southern Sweden. It's about half an hour north of Malmö.

-Are you living alone or with your family?
I am married to a Swede, and we have two children.

-How long have you been living in Sweden?
9.5 years. We moved to Sweden in January 1997 from Chicago, where we met. We lived in an apartment in Malmö for the first year, and after our first child was born we moved to Flyinge. After our second child was born, we built a new and bigger house in the village, and we moved in four years ago.

-What is your age?
I'm nearly 42.

-When did you come up with the idea of living in Sweden?
My father was in the Air Force and we moved overseas the summer I turned 13, to Belgium where we lived for three years, and then Germany for another three years. My family did not want to return to the States after the second tour of duty, but it was at the time when bases were downsizing and closing, and my dad couldn't get a new contract in Europe. Moving back to Europe was a dream of mine since our return in 1982, and it was not even a question when I met my husband in 1994.

-Was it hard to get a visa or a working permit?
Not at all. We were already married when we applied.

-How do you make your living in Sweden? Do you have any type of income generated?
I did not work for the first three years after we moved to Sweden since I got pregnant almost right away (and finding a job in Sweden when you're pregnant is nearly impossible), and we decided to go ahead and get the family started before I would bother, since my husband had a good job. It was a tough time, living on one salary in Sweden. When my daughter was four months old, an expat friend sent me a clipping of a newspaper ad for a marketing position with Ericsson (which could have been written with me in mind). I answered it, interviewed and got the job within two weeks, despite the obstacle of having a baby not yet old enough to put in daycare (the minimum age limit is one year in Sweden). Since I had to find a full-time babysitter first, I didn't start work until she was seven months old, and both my kids went into daycare then.

I worked for Ericsson for 4.5 years, at which point the subsidiary company I was part of folded and was incorporated into the rest of the organization. I used my network of contacts (as well as utilizing several different web job-search sites) and landed a new marketing position immediately at Axis Communications. I'm a marketing coordinator, and work with layouts, graphics, presentations, web and newsletters, and have done so for over 15 years total.

I had no trouble whatsoever finding a job, and the second time I even had two job offers and had to make a choice. Being a native English-speaker (and having a degree in English) was actually a bonus in my field, as the corporate language for both companies I have worked for in Sweden is English, although I speak Swedish in the office with my colleagues.

-Do you speak Swedish and do you think it's important to speak the local language?
I speak and read Swedish fluently, although I rarely write in Swedish, and my writing skills are nowhere near as advanced. I took a beginner course in Chicago before we moved, and then continued with two courses after moving here. Sweden offers free Swedish classes to all immigrants, so there is really no excuse for not learning at least the basics.

I think it is very important, as well as courteous, to at least make the attempt to learn the language of your host country. The problem in Sweden is that EVERYONE (at least under the age of 65) speaks English, or at least understands it. Film and television are subtitled, not dubbed, and there are plenty of materials available in English. Often, even when I am speaking Swedish people will answer me in English, because they want to be polite or because they want to practice their own English!

-Do you miss home and family sometimes?
I definitely miss my family, although after nearly ten years away, most of my old friends have faded away, since very few of them bothered to put any effort into keeping a correspondence or long-distance friendship going. I talk on the phone with my mother and siblings frequently (at least one of them once a week, and my brother, who lives in Germany and is married to a German national, even more often since he has cheap calling rates). My mother, sister, brother and I (my father is deceased) keep an e-mail round robin letter ongoing at all times. One of us always answers, in turn, and we reply each time to all of us so that we all get the more mundane day-to-day and weekly news that is so important to keeping each other in the loop.

I think that living so far away from my family would have been much harder without e-mail and the Internet. My mother has been to visit us at least once every year and my brother has come to Sweden several times. My sister has been twice as well. We have been home about five times since we moved here, but it's been two years since our last visit to the States (due to several reasons including the house-building) and will probably be at least three years total before we get there again. I think that is too long; I already feel very much an outsider when I am in the States, although I know that if we moved there again I would re-acclimate fairly quickly. Ideally I would like to go "home" at least every 1.5 years. I have read that five years is the limit for an expat to move back easily, since after that things will have changed so much that it will be like moving to a new foreign country and I have seen that trend myself just visiting.

One of the most important things that I have done for myself since moving to Sweden was to be a part of starting the local American Women's Club in Malmö. I served on the board for seven years as the Newsletter Editor and the club and the people I met through it helped me greatly in my adjustment to living abroad. At first, my attitude was "if I had wanted to meet Americans I would have stayed in America" but I came to realize that our exceedingly international group (only 65 percent of the members are American) was the best support system I could have surrounded myself with, as it consisted of women who were in the same situation as I was: living abroad in a foreign country, married to a foreign national, raising bilingual children, learning a new language, job-hunting in a different culture. Having friends to talk and vent these things over with really helped and still does.

Most of the friends I have made are also expats who are living in Sweden more or less permanently, although I have some very close Swedish friends as well. I also think that keeping that connection to Americans and American traditions (we celebrate 4th of July, Easter, Christmas, etc.) is important for my children's sake, so that they are aware of and comfortable with that side of their heritage as well.

-Do you have other plans for the future?
My husband and I have always talked about moving somewhere else (not the U.S. or Sweden) where we could BOTH be the foreigner at the same time. It would probably be fairly easy for us to move to somewhere else in Europe with either his job or mine, but while the kids were small and our house was in progress we didn't pursue it. It has been coming up again in conversation lately, though. :)

-What about housing, have you bought, or are you renting a home? How much do you pay for it?
We built our second home here, albeit in a small village, and it was expensive, although the lot itself was relatively cheap. We would not be able to afford it if we were not both working full-time. House prices have skyrocketed in Sweden in the past 5-6 years.

-What is the cost of living in Sweden?
Taxes are relatively high in Sweden, income tax is as much as 50 percent, but high-income earners pay a larger percentage of their income, while low-income earners pay a lower percentage. The government pays a great deal for the economic security and welfare of the people, by providing, for example, heavily subsidized healthcare, child and elderly care, schools and universities, as well as various pension plans, unemployment, housing allowances, social assistance programs, etc. Sweden has a reputation of being one of the more expensive places to live, but in fact, that is no longer true, and it's actually cheaper to live here than in most European countries.

-What do you think about the Swedish people?
Swedes are stereotypically thought of as being withdrawn, restrained, un-spontaneous and honest, and while they all have those elements, that is certainly not the whole story. They are typically harder to get to know than the average American, but their friendships are very important to them and are rarely superficial in any way. They tend to make and stay close friends with people from their childhood and/or school, for example. At least as an English-speaking expat, I have always been warmly welcomed and received by the Swedes I have met through my husband, his family, my work and the expat organization I belong to. However, I know that there is a growing trend of dismay and dislike for the wave of refugees and immigrants from the Middle East and Africa.

-What are the positive and negative aspects of living in Sweden?
To be honest, I don't see a lot of really negative aspects of living here. Sweden is very modern, very technologically-minded, and very forward-thinking. It's a CLEAN country, and a safe one. The prevailing attitude is that family, global responsibility and decent standards of living are the more important things in life. Work is flexible and more relaxed than in the States.

-Do you have any tips for our readers about living in Sweden?
As with any move to a new country, I think the most important thing is to try and limit your tendency to comparison. If you think of things as DIFFERENT, instead of "better" or "worse" you will have a much easier time adjusting.

-Do you have any favorite Web sites or blogs about Sweden?
SWEDEN.SE is an excellent all-around information and resource site about Sweden, Swedes and Swedish.

THE LOCAL is a thorough and up-to-date Web site offering Swedish news in English.

AWC MALMÖ - the American Women's Club of Malmö

LIZARDEK'S OBITER DICTUM is my own online journal: Motor city baby, Air Force brat, American expat in Sweden

BRIEF THERAPY is the online journal of the most positive expat in Sweden.